Sports

The Most Annoying Sports Figures Through Time

Individuals in sports can represent everything great about the human spirit.  They can come from multiple types of backgrounds, possess different physical abilities, and perform on all levels of greatness.

Their drive and courage can inspire a nation. It is up to every athlete to decide how hard they work and how selfish or team-oriented they want to be.

I love hearing stories about sports figures who put forth more effort than anyone expects.  Athletes that rise above their talent level because of pure concentration and determination.  These individuals  show us how we can succeed in any situation no matter what life may present.

This is a list of athletes that decided to ignore all of those instincts.

They spit in the face of their god-given abilities.  They decided to stop working and simply rest upon the talent they were blessed with.  These sports figures only think about themselves even though they are part of a bigger unit.

Each of them possess attributes that take away from the success of their team while trying to force greatness upon themselves.  These are the worst offenders over the course of sports history and why I consider them to be the most annoying sports figures EVER!

Milton Bradley

Milton Bradley is the worst. He is an athlete who succeeds whenever he is healthy, not suspended, or permitted (by his employers) to play. He continually blows my mind. He is the angriest man in the world with absolutely nothing to be angry about. Milton has a plethora of talent, and yet is only able to showcase it for no more than 40-50 games without completely imploding.

What went so wrong? You have a fun name. Is it maybe that the other man with the same name as you took all your happiness and used it to make great kids’ games? Milton’s anger has pushed him from team to team.

Here are a few of the instances that have forced these moves.

2004: Confrontation with then Indians manager Erik Wedge which led to his trade to the Dodgers

2004: After a fan throws a plastic bottle onto the field Bradley grabs the bottle and approaches the stands, slams the bottle at the feet of the fan, yells at him, is ejected, then throws a bag of balls (above picture) onto the field, beautiful.

2005: Accuses Jeff Kent of being racist (I know he has one helluva mustache, but that is not immediate grounds for racism) which leads to his trade from the Dodgers to the A’s.

2007: Jacks up his knee being held back by manager Bud Black while arguing with an umpire.  This injury would have made me truly happy except that it killed the Padres playoff push that year. He was, at  the time, their best offensive threat heading down the stretch. So, in his infinite wisdom, he decides that it’s time to get into it with the umpire.  I’ve heard stories that the umpire was bating him. Who cares? Aren’t the playoffs more important than retaliation? Guess not, at least for Milton.

Stephon Marbury:

Oh Starbury, you entitled little man. Isn’t the world hard? Why is every coach against you? Why do all your teams end up kicking you off? Why is everyone against you? Guess what, they’re not. You’re just a horrible, tattooed, angry beast.

Like a lot of the people you will be hearing about, Marbury could have success at almost every level of the game, if he would just play.

Stephon Marbury’s first stop, Minnesota. For three years his points per game average went up  (16,18, then 22 pts.). That wasn’t enough for Starbury. Marbury initiated altercations with the Timberwolves management and coaching staff. Soon after he was traded to the Nets. Lack of team success and a selfish attitude pushed Marbury from the Nets, to the Suns, and finally to the Knicks.

Marbury cemented a reputation as the most arrogant and disrespectful player in NBA history while playing for the Knicks. Coach Larry Brown was fired because of fights provoked by Marbury. Replacement coach, Isiah Thomas felt more of the same pressure and soon stepped down.

When new coach Mike D’Antoni came aboard in 2008 he set Marbury against Chris Duhon for the starting point guard position. Marbury lost the battle and D’Antoni decided he didn’t want Marbury in the rotation at all.

Now banned from team activities Marbury sits not on the bench, but in a court side seat … that he pays for. Marbury enjoys his Knick games talking on the cell phone, greeting celebrities, and avoiding the harsh reality that nobody wants him around. You can never be happy Starbury, and for that I feel bad; actually I don’t. I hope you fall and skin your knee the next time you leave your house.

Martin Gramatica:

I despise you. You jumping, dancing, little Argentinean freak. The celebration presented by kicker Martin Gramatica  may fool one into thinking  he has single handedly wiped the plight of H.I.V. from the face of the Earth.

In actuality he has scored three points for his respective team, almost as exciting though. His dance brings shame to an already loathed position in the sports world. You know that every kicker in football looks at Gramatica like he is the geekiest of the geeks, and that his dance of success is somehow tarnishing to them all.  The Lord struck your brother down mid-celebration, why do you escape?

Just promise me one thing Martin, at the pinnacle of one of your celebration jumps repeat these words, “I’m a f#$@in kicker, and I just scored three points”.  It’s not meant to be a positive affirmation.

Terrell Owens:

This crazy sack of wide receiver drives me nuts. I hate me some Terrell Owens. He is Jerry Rice in opposite world. Physically T.O. is incredible, mentally he’s insane. If I was going to create a wide receiver from scratch he would look a lot like Terrell Owens; six foot three, two hundred and fifteen pounds, big hands, great speed, unbelievable strength. In short he’s a beast.

For years defenses have had no answers for T.O. and his abilities. The only true defense has come from his own brash personality.

Now, let us journey through time and re-cap T.O.’s career. While playing for the 49ers Terrell accuses his quarterback, Jeff Garcia, of being gay in a 2003 Playboy interview. Congratulations, either you are a horrible person and lied about this fact or you actually outed a gay male in a largely publicized magazine. Either way I hate you.

Next it was on to the Eagles where he really stepped up the crazy. He was seen wearing a Michael Irvin jersey after a loss to the Cowboys. He got into a fight with Hugh Douglas in the locker room when Douglas questioned his attitude. He was quoted saying that the Eagles would be undefeated if Brett Favre was their quarterback instead of Donovan McNabb. Furthermore, McNabb was “out of shape” during their Super Bowl appearance.

He then was suspended and released. Of course T.O. blamed the media for his troubles. Next stop Dallas, where he still resides, and still isn’t happy with his offensive inclusion. He doesn’t get the ball enough and Jason Witten gets the ball too much. Just ask him. He’ll tell anyone who will listen as well as  yell on the sidelines to the people who aren’t.

Wins don’t matter, only getting him the ball matters.  He cries in public, whines on the sidelines, and apparently tries to off himself; sound sane?  Sounds completely annoying.

Ryan Leaf:

This one is an old one, but a good one. I feel as if I can add some real inside perspective into the myth and lore that is Ryan Leaf.  I know you’ve heard of what he did, or didn’t do, for the San Diego Chargers. The outbursts, the lack of success, and the “Kevin Federline” arrogance you obtain from accomplishing nothing. You’re probably thinking all the things I used to, “he can’t really be as bad as they all say”.  Well, they were all right.  He’s just terrible.

Ryan Leaf is originally from Montana, as am I. Now as you may know there isn’t that many people that inhabit my great state. So when a large arrogant ex-quarterback comes back home you end up running into him.

I have interacted with Ryan Leaf on three different occasions and guess what, he’s horrible. He’s the most self-loving, loud, annoying person in the room, no matter which room he’s in. If he wasn’t known as the douche-bag who was a bust in the NFL he’d be just the douche-bag that you want to trip as he walks by you.  He literally is that bad in person.

The next time you feel yourself gracing  “Mr. tough time in the league” with some form of pity, I beg you not to. He deserves to be where he is and everyone who knows him is happy for it. Our only regret is that if he would’ve been successful we wouldn’t have had to see him as much in Montana.

Wilt Chamberlain

Let’s not get bent out of shape here. I’m not annoyed of Wilt Chamberlain as a person, only of the circumstances in which he succeeded. I’m not great at basketball post play, but put me in a league with junior high kids and their is a good chance I will dominate their worlds. He was  five to six inches taller than all of the people guarding him when he came into the league.

Again I don’t want to disrespect him as a person, but I don’t respect his gaudy numbers. I will dunk on a thirteen year old any day of the week, and no one will call that great. They will probably just get mad at me for skulking around the junior high and rejecting kids playing ball. Frankly, I’m a little jealous of the women he got because of his success. Although, I’m only about 9,995 behind him.

Brett Favre:

Gasp!! Not Brett Favre, not him. He’s tough, talented, charismatic, fun, and looks good in Wranglers. Talk to me four years ago and I would never have thought he was God-awful annoying, but that was four years ago. It was four years ago when he didn’t take the entire length of every off-season to decide whether or not he’s coming back.

He takes his sweet-ass time every year to figure out if the drive is still there. In the mean time the team he is on can’t start preparing for the new year. They have no idea who their quarterback is going to be! Take this off-season for instance. Favre says he needs two months to determine whether he will be back or not.  So while he is working out this tough decision the coaching staff of the Jets can’t fully plan next year.

What if he doesn’t come back after all?  What then?  The Jets are stuck looking for a starting quarterback two months after the rest of the league already knows if they need a new QB.  It’s selfish and horrible. Freakin’ gray beard, i wish you still wore braces so I could make fun of you for that.

Tom Brady:

This one is a hard pick to defend. He worked hard, came out of nowhere, used his intelligence and work ethic to get him to the top. Well you know what, I don’t care. It’s hard because we get mad if you don’t succeed, then if you do succeed we get jealous and hate you. Well tough, you have taken too much. You can’t win three super-bowls and date Giselle, it makes us feel horrible.

I constantly revel in any personal defeat of yours. I knocked over a table in excitement this year when you were injured.  I do feel guilty for my hatred of you, but I will never take it back. I will live with this guilt along with all my non-perfect brothers in this great nation.  I’m pretty sure you stole my girlfriend at Summer Camp.

Leave a Comment

  1. big 0 says:

    because o.j. was in a major role in naked gun, favre only had a small part in something about mary. o.j. wins.

  2. gtpeach says:

    tom brady – haha! seriously, though, how does favre rank higher than oj simpson?

  3. reeder says:

    hey big o that was f$@##$* amazing and hilarious

  4. Very nice Dallas Cowboys information. I hope to be in Dallas for a game this fall.

  5. gggg says:

    Tom is AWESOME so shut the fuck up you cock sucker!!!!!!

  6. Cindy says:

    This is REALLY funny. We may need to add Mark Sanchez to that list, only because the Jet fans are driving me nuts!!

  7. tyler says:

    tom brady is the best motherfucker on the entire damn earth

  8. Frozen Hoops says:

    Wilt Chamberlain five to six inches taller than everyone guarding him? What are you talking about.
    During his entire career Wilt was never ever the tallest player in the league. Get your facts straight! He stood a shade under 7-foot-1. If height was the isse in that case…why did Manute Bol 7-foot-7 or Yao Ming 7-foot-5 not average 50 ppg or 25 rpg? When Wilt was in his 50s' he dominated Magic Johnson when he was in his prime during pickup games at UCLA. When Wilt was 36 years old and led the Lakers to the NBA title there were nine centres in the NBA as tall or taller including 7-foot-3 Kareem Abdul Jabbar. Jabbar at age 25 averaged 16.2 rpg in the playoffs while Wilt – who was smaller in stature by 3 inches – averaged 22.5 rpg.