How to Be a Cop: Learning Self Defense

Welcome to the second edition of AMOG’s ongoing series on how to be a cop. This week we’re going to tackle self-defense tactics.

This has nothing to do with fighting, because getting into a fight could have some serious repercussions.

Le’t say that you’re at a bar and there’s a frat boy who’s had one too many. He gets rowdy, and no matter how much you would love to bash in the skull of the John Mayer loving douchebag, doing so would get you into some serious legal problems. Think Nic Cage in Con Air.

The best scenario is to lay the dude on his back and have everyone else laugh at him. Plus, you won’t be getting locked up.

You may not think that cops know  self-defense tactics, but I bet that even Larry, the middle aged doughnut inhaler, has got a couple of tricks up his sleeve.

Here are some basic self-defense tactics to get you started. And, please, don’t be a moron and try these with the guys when you’re all piss drunk.

Defense Against a Punch

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Defense Against a Club, Bat, etc.


Knife Defense

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Gun Disarming (Do I have to remind you to be extremely cautious with this, you’re not Chuck Norris!)

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Roll & Strike


Ground Defense

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Throws and Takedowns

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Bear Hug Escapes

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Choke Escapes


Head Lock Escapes

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There’s a lot out there on YouTube or instructional DVD’s. If you’re really serious about learning more, I would suggest taking some karate or self-defense classes. They’re readily available, so get off the couch and learn something.

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  1. I think these are something very good steps showed up here for not only learn but try to make yourself ready to be a cop if there are some enthisiasm or eagarness are there.